How to Eye-dentify Great Sunnies
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On Fashion's Eye-dentity Crisis
In my life, two things have proven true: The first cut's the deepest, and the best sunglasses are the cheapest. Ish.
Over the years, I have spent considerable amounts of money on sunglasses, in addition to the many luxe samples my line of work has provided me. The only common denominator these shades share aside from hefty retail price tags, however, is that I no longer own a single pair of them, having either lost or ruined each and every one not long into our respective time together.
Is this my fault more than that of these fancy sunglasses? Perhaps. Yet despite the obvious lessons to be learned about the caretaking of possessions, regardless of their quality, my eventual shift from expensive to cheap sunnies has been rewarded with more compliments and higher satisfaction than I should be allowed to dish in the shopping newsletter for a style magazine.
As a matter of fact, my most treasured and frequently commented-on pair is a set that I spent a whopping $7 on at a rest stop somewhere in Georgia from one of those wheeled rotating stands. They're Oakley-esque but brandless, super lightweight but sturdy — somehow rubbery even — and I swear my vampire pupils have never felt so relaxed in broad daylight. There's no mind-fucky discoloration of what I'm glancing at either, and they double as a hair band for unruly curls without surprise-sliding from scalp to nose at the merest tilt of my head.
God knows I'd gladly have paid a decent sum to enjoy the benefits listed above — and so would anyone, I'd venture. But buying sunglasses mustn't be a gas station versus savings account conundrum if you're abiding by the right criteria, a majority of which I've already listed.
As a recent trip to Lake Como made painfully apparent, a lot of the fashion industry's most respected brands have regrettably little eyewear game and should be held responsible for some of the gaudiest frames I ever did see. Blame it on licensing deals, labels’ logo-ladden attention-seeking, or rich folks’ poor judgement — those giant acetate goggles aren't doing anybody any favors. After all, you want to look fly, not like one.
Counter to what a quick scan of the crowd at Salone del Mobile might've suggested, Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy's signature ovals aren't the sole alternative to bug-like designer windshields, cute as they are. What makes good sunglasses great is not about extreme or trendy silhouettes (nor is it necessary to access the metaverse by wearing them). Instead, it really does boil down to stone-cold convenience in every which way.
A trusty Ray-Ban, I'd argue, is rarely-if-ever a miss; its Daddy-O and Olympian I styles especially are courting me right now, with their slender black optics and vast compatibility across everything from sporty to suave ensembles. The same can be said of Port Tanger's Tangerine, or Jacques Marie Mage's Clemens — all somewhat classic guises that welcome an occasional clash too, right up there with my personal knack for, say, preppy clothes with speedy shades.
Be careful with tinted lenses. I love them as much as the next guy, but at some point they resemble window-grade faux-reading glasses. You'll be thankful for a polarized model's lessened glare if what you want is a useful accessory, not just a pretty one.
Tired of those vintage Guccis that half of Copenhagen’s been sporting for multiple summers straight, or those tiny Berlin-y Matrix ones I'm not sure even fully cover an iris? Same! Cutler and Gross, Gentle Monster, and CHIMI each do a flavor of timeless-contemporary with an edge, rather than anything so contemporary that they’re practically date-stamped.
If eyes are the windows to the soul, then there's no shame in a little extra zhuzhing-up (and protecting) of them, and who am I to tell you, really, what shape that should take? And yet, subjective as an individual's taste may be, there is a difference between decoration and distraction… And as for one last piece of advice: Just try not to sit on your sunnies. Not even the most sacred souvenir shop holy grail pair can take that kind of pressure in stride.
Open Tabs
EVERYTHING WE'VE GOT OUR EYES ON RIGHT NOW:
I know with the hotter season approaching, buying jackets isn't top of mind. But for this silken Ssstein, you may want to make an expectation.
Or for this Dries Van Noten fellow, for something that's both workwear-y and summer-colored.
Cannot get this white Bottega Veneta slipper out of my head, but not sure I can pull it off. Wdyt?
Maybe Prada's pearly lace-up America's Cup would be easier to execute?
Not into white shoes? How about some baby blue adidas Mary Jane Sambas instead?
Acne Studios’ kitten heel flip-flops eclipse whatever sad beach flats you thought you were rocking up in. I’m not big on logos, but the Swedes’ new font slays on a polo also, just saying.
Come June, people will be living in these barrel-leg linen pants by COS.
GAP's doing really well I hear, and its sale on unfussy staples like boxy tees, oversized hoodies, and linen flannels sure does its part in supporting that ascension.
These Nike socks aren't ideal for open-toe footwear, nor would I want to conceal their cool Swoosh in a sneaker, so consider wearing them to all the parties at shoes-off households you can find.
And finally, why don't you make sure your bottoms are buckled up tight, courtesy of this Carhartt belt?
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